Monday, June 13, 2016

1254 - Next To Godliness

The Russians, at least in Tom Clancy novels, use the insult nekulturny.  It's a heavy insult, and it translates (I think) to "mannerless, ignorant fool", but as a curse.  

For today's Ungood Art Day, then, I will be nekulturny and post someone else's Ungood Art instead of my own.  Why?  Because it makes me laugh.  So what's so funny?  The artist is doing what they think is best, but in their earnest journey for artistic truth they overlook an obvious mistake and plow ahead to the conclusion anyways.  It's textbook Ungood Art.

One example is my friend Earl's chili recipe, which features two kilos of ground beef, chopped walnuts and water chestnuts, but no tomato all cooked on 7 until it's done.  Just the thought of following that recipe to its conclusion makes me laugh until I weep.  However, Earl has a counterpoint: Bitter Litter, a University-era performance piece where I am definitely at my Ungoodest.  So, I won't tease Earl about his chili.

Instead, I have this photo taken at the graduation of my ukulele class.  Yes, I can play the uke, a little anyhow.  I'm easy to see in this picture because I am tall and wearing orange.  I'm also standing next to Frank, who at the moment of the photograph being snapped chose to transcend Buddha-like into a new plane of existence. 

We're posing for the photo, and Jen the Instructor notices that sunbeams from the overhead skylight make Frank's shirt glow a little.  Oh well, she thinks she could fix it in Photoshop.  A little glow is an understatement.  This is God's own spotlight directed full force on the face of Frank, who appears far more angelic in the photo than he does when you meet him in real life.  

This is likely one of the worst photographs I have seen.  The fact that I am in it just makes it even sweeter.  I may even frame it and keep it in the kitchen for whenever I make chili.